It's a Good Day to Sweep It Under the Rug
(Said no one, but we sure act like it)
I'm being sarcastic, of course. Surely we're not all out there waking up thinking, "Hey, you know all those feelings of unease, the relationship at odds, the discomfort in my current state? Today's a great day to sweep them all under the rug!"
Well... are we?
OK, maybe it's just me, but it sure seems like we do it with such ease, it must be a conscious choice.
The good news? We don't have to. In fact, we may find that pulling it out from under the proverbial rug actually makes us feel better. Science tells us that simply putting words to our emotions reduces activity in the brain's alarm system, literally calming our fight-or-flight response. And when we talk about what's bothering us with someone who's there to listen, studies show it can reduce stress, strengthen our immune system, and lower both our physical and emotional distress.
And when we don't? That rug sure does get lumpy, just waiting to trip us up at the worst time. Hate to bring science back into it, but studies have shown that suppressing emotions over time is associated with an increased risk of earlier death.
The alternative isn't dramatic. It's not about unloading everything on everyone. It may just start with finding one person and having one conversation. One step toward naming what we've been carrying. Over time, it might just become a habit.
Maybe that person is your spouse, a friend or a priest. Maybe it's a coach or leader who's built an environment of psychological safety. Maybe it's a therapist (yup, believe it or not, they're pretty darn good at helping us with these sorts of things).
Whoever it is, it's gotta be better than sweeping it under the rug.